Proverbs 31 woman
(Sermon Notes)
By Warren Zehrung – July 30, 2005

In Church history we have had a problem in that we sometimes consider our Holy Women to be lesser citizens – compared to the men in our congregations.

It was never stated outright, but women have not been treated with the same dignity and respect that men have been.

God never looks at women that way– even though the Scripture says women are the “Weaker Vessel.”

Let’s understand that women are heirs to the Kingdom of God with all the rights and dignity that men possess.

It was understood by too many that women were to be told to submit and stay in their place.

Women are even now Children of God – same as men – to be born eternally into the Family of God.

There will be neither male nor female in God’s Kingdom.

Today we will be looking at special traits and Godly characteristics of women – from a Biblical perspective.

David had a six-hundred man security force while he was out of favor with King Saul.  That was a rather powerful peace keeping force in those days.

David was being effective in protecting the land from marauding bands of outsiders who preyed upon outlying homesteaders.

The people of the land who benefited from David’s services  contributed to the welfare of the security team.  David’s security force needed food and provisions to carry on their dangerous task.

1 Samuel 25:

1  And Samuel [the prophet] died; and all the Israelites were gathered together, and lamented him, and buried him in his house at Ramah. And David arose, and went down to the wilderness of Paran.

2  And there was a man in Maon, whose possessions were in Carmel; and the man was very great [rich], and he had three thousand sheep, and a thousand goats: and he was shearing his sheep in Carmel.

Nabal means “fool” in Hebrew

1 Samuel 25:

3  Now the name of the man was Nabal; and the name of his wife Abigail: and she was a woman of good understanding, and of a beautiful countenance: but the man was churlish [rude] and evil [lawless] in his doings; and he was of the house of Caleb.

Abigail was a Godly woman of good behavior, attitude and a beautiful woman in the way she conducted herself.

When the Bible says that Abigail was of “good understanding” it means that she had a good deal of Godly wisdom and fortitude.

1 Samuel 25:

4  And David heard in the wilderness that Nabal did shear his sheep.

5  And David sent out ten young men, and David said unto the young men, Get you up to Carmel, and go to Nabal, and greet him in my name:

6  And thus shall ye say to him that live in prosperity, Peace be both to thee, and peace be to thine house, and peace be unto all that thou have.

7  And now I have heard that thou hast [sheep] shearers: now thy shepherds which were with us, we hurt them not, neither was there anything missing unto them, all the while they were in Carmel.

Nabal, all your young shepherds were well protected by us from marauding enemy bands …and we never took advantage of them in any way.

1 Samuel 25:

8  Ask thy young men, and they will show thee. Wherefore let the young men find favor in thine eyes: for we come in a good day: give, I pray thee, whatsoever cometh to thine hand unto thy servants, and to thy son David. [David was the leader of the protective group.]

They were soliciting a contribution for their work that had profited Cabal considerably.

1 Samuel 25:

9  And when David's young men came, they spoke to Nabal according to all those words in the name of David, and ceased.

Nabal said I can’t be helping ever group that has broken away from their master.   Nabal slammed David – and did not care about his predicament.

David had sent a few men to receive a donation to help them in their necessary service to the community.

1 Samuel 25:

10  And Nabal answered David's servants, and said, Who is David?  And who is the son of Jesse?  There be many servants now a days that break away every man from his master.

11  Shall I then take my bread, and my water, and my flesh that I have killed for my shearers, and give it unto men, whom I know not whence they be?

I don’t know these men of where they came from.

1 Samuel 25:

12  So David's young men turned their way, and went again, and came and told him all those sayings.

13  And David said unto his men, Gird ye on every man his sword.  And they girded on every man his sword; and David also girded on his sword: and there went up after David about four hundred men; and two hundred abode by the stuff.

David lost it – he became enraged against Nabal.  David intended to wipe Nabal and his entire homestead off the face of the map.

1 Samuel 25:

14  But one of the young men told Abigail, Nabal's wife, saying, Behold, David sent messengers out of the wilderness to salute our master; and he railed on them.

Nabal was totally unreasonable and unappreciative of David’s protection.

The young man realized that Nabal had made a terrible mistake so he went to warn Abigail of the coming trouble.  He knew to appeal to Abigail because obviously she was the level-headed one in Nabal’s household.

1 Samuel 25:

15  But the men were very good unto us, and we were not hurt, neither missed we any thing, as long as we were conversant with them, when we were in the fields:

Notice the protection provided by David, and his men to the shepherds.

1 Samuel 25:

16  They were a wall [protection] unto us both by night and day, all the while we were with them keeping the sheep.

17  Now therefore know and consider what thou wilt do; for evil is determined against our master, and against all his household: for he is such a son of Belial, that a man cannot speak to him.

Nabal would not listen to reason… The definition of Belial is, "worthless," – the spirit of evil personified… and Abigail was well aware of Nabal’s hard-headedness.

David and his men made it possible for Nabal to prosper.

What would Abigail do?

* 1 Samuel 25:

18  Then Abigail made haste, and took two hundred loaves, and two bottles of wine, and five sheep ready dressed [ready to cook], and five measures of parched corn, and an hundred clusters of raisins, and two hundred cakes of figs, and laid them on donkeys.

Abigail sent veritable truckloads of produce!

1 Samuel 25:

19  And she said unto her servants, Go on before me; behold, I come after you. But she told not her husband Nabal.

Abigail knew that Nabal was too unreasonable to deal with.

1 Samuel 25:

20  And it was so, as she rode on the donkey, that she came down by the covert of the hill, and, behold, David and his men came down against her; and she met them.

David was in an aggressive attitude at this point.

1 Samuel 25:

21  Now David had said, Surely in vain have I kept all that this fellow hath in the wilderness, so that nothing was missed of all that pertained unto him: and he hath requited me evil for good.

22  So and more also do God unto the enemies of David, if I leave of all that pertain to him by the morning light any that see the morning light.

David fully intended to wipe out Nabal – lock, stock and barrel – that included men women and children – even Abigail, too.

1 Samuel 25:

23  And when Abigail saw David, she hasted, and lighted off the donkey, and fell before David on her face, and bowed herself to the ground,

Notice Abigail’s attitude.  Abigail knows that David is powerful…

1 Samuel 25:

24  And fell at his feet, and said, Upon me, my lord, upon me let this iniquity be: and let thine handmaid, I pray thee, speak in thine audience, and hear the words of thine handmaid.

Abigail admits that she realizes how impossible and foolish her husband, Nabal, is.  She says, “Had I been there – I would have seen to it that it worked out right.”

1 Samuel 25:

25  Let not my lord, I pray thee, regard this man of Belial, even Nabal: for as his name is, so is he; Nabal is his name, and folly is with him: but I thine handmaid saw not the young men of my lord, whom thou didst send.

Abigail shows her great wisdom.  She says that if she had been there when David’s men came – the result would have been entirely different.

*Brethren, foolish people see Abigail as a rebellious, non-submissive wife – but let’s examine the full meaning of God’s intent. 

*We will see that Abigail not only saves her husband Nabal, she saves David – whom she knew God had great plans for with respect to all Israel and the Kingdom of God.

Abigail saves David from making a horrible error that would have destroyed his reputation and life.

1 Samuel 25:

26  Now therefore, my lord, as the LORD lives, and as thy soul lives, seeing the LORD hath withheld thee from coming to shed blood, and from avenging thyself with thine own hand, now let thine enemies, and they that seek evil to my lord, be as Nabal.

*SPS God intends women in the Church to be women of spiritual fortitude, wisdom and strength.

1 Samuel 25:

27  And now this blessing which thine handmaid hath brought unto my lord, let it even be given unto the young men that follow my lord.

*Abigail takes the blame for letting things get out of hand – and reveals that she was aware of the working of God’s Holy Spirit in David’s life, and God’s great plans for David.  (see verse 30)

1 Samuel 25:

28  I pray thee, forgive the trespass of thine handmaid: for the LORD will certainly make my lord [David] a sure house; because my lord fights the battles of the LORD, and evil hath not been found in thee all thy days.

Abigail, in great faith in God, realized that even though King Saul wanted to kill David, his life would be preserved by God for God’s greater purposes and Plan.

1 Samuel 25:

29  Yet a man is risen to pursue thee, and to seek thy soul: but the soul of my lord shall be bound in the bundle of life with the LORD thy God; and the souls of thine enemies, them shall he sling out, as out of the middle of a sling.

30  And it shall come to pass, when the LORD shall have done to my lord according to all the good that he hath spoken concerning thee, and shall have appointed thee ruler over Israel;

Abigail knew the prophecies about David – and that David was about to commit a shameful act of vengeance that would be forever a thorn in his side – rendering David unfit for the throne of Israel.

Abigail counted on David to reflect on her word and make the right choice.  Abigail was so certain that David would choose correctly – she even tied her long-range future welfare to David.  Abigail could look at Nabal’s health and realize that he was not going to be around for much longer.

1 Samuel 25:

31  That this shall be no grief unto thee, nor offence of heart unto my lord, either that thou hast shed blood causeless, or that my lord hath avenged himself: but when the LORD shall have dealt well with my lord, then remember thine handmaid.

This reminds me of when Joseph asked the Chief Butler to Pharaoh to remember him when he got out of prison.

Genesis 40:

14  But think on me when it shall be well with thee, and show kindness, I pray thee, unto me, and make mention of me unto Pharaoh, and bring me out of this house:

23  Yet did not the chief butler remember Joseph, but forgot Joseph.

Nabal’s bad heart would not last long.

1 Samuel 25:

32  And David said to Abigail, Blessed be the LORD God of Israel, which sent thee this day to meet me:

David begins to calm down – And men notice this:  David listened to the advice of a woman!  God intended it so.

1 Samuel 25:

33  And blessed be thy advice, and blessed be thou, which hast kept me this day from coming to shed blood, and from avenging myself with mine own hand.

34  For in very deed, as the LORD God of Israel lives, which hath kept me back from hurting thee, except thou had hasted [quickly] and come to meet me, surely there had not been left unto Nabal by the morning light any that pisses against the wall. [All the males anyway.]

David listened to Abigail – a Proverbs 31 woman.  She stepped out in faith.  She was coolheaded and wise.  David appreciated Abigail.

1 Samuel 25:

35  So David received of her hand that which she had brought him, and said unto her, Go up in peace to thine house; see, I have hearkened to thy voice, and have accepted thy person.

36  And Abigail came to Nabal; and, behold, he held a feast in his house, like the feast of a king; and Nabal's heart was merry within him, for he was very drunken: wherefore she told him nothing, less or more, until the morning light.

Nabal was in an alcoholic stupor – Abigail could not speak to him in that state... but then Nabal has a heart attack when Abigail tells Nabal how they had been spared because of her intervention.

1 Samuel 25:

37  But it came to pass in the morning, when the wine was gone out of Nabal, and his wife had told him these things, that his heart died within him, and he became as a stone.

38  And it came to pass about ten days after, that the LORD smote Nabal, that he died.

God says that vengeance is His – and God prevented David from making a terrible mistake – through Abigail.

1 Samuel 25:

39  And when David heard that Nabal was dead, he said, Blessed be the LORD, that hath pleaded the cause of my reproach from the hand of Nabal, and hath kept his servant from evil: for the LORD hath returned the wickedness of Nabal upon his own head. And David sent and communed with Abigail, to take her to him to wife.

40  And when the servants of David were come to Abigail to Carmel, they spoke unto her, saying, David sent us unto thee, to take thee to him to wife.

41  And she arose, and bowed herself on her face to the earth, and said, Behold, let thine handmaid be a servant to wash the feet of the servants of my lord.

Only a servant – Abigail is a type of Christ and the role true of the Church.

1 Samuel 25:

42  And Abigail hasted, and arose, and rode upon an donkey, with five damsels of hers that went after her; and she went after the messengers of David, and became his wife.

David was not intimidated by a woman who took decisive action – he was impressed with her.

David was obviously impressed with her – but not intimidated.

We see that this woman, Abigail, saved David from making a terrible mistake – worst in his life.

Our Scripture today is Proverbs 31

Young women today are not being taught as they should be to become Proverbs 31 women.

These Scriptures describe God’s ideal qualities for women.  But, is it even possible for a woman today to live up to the standards of the Proverbs 31 woman?

All women do not grow up with a proper understanding of their Godly role.

We find that there are two extremes:  Some women do not learn to take Godly initiative in their marriages – and other women go off into the work-place world to “do their own thing.”

In marriage, a man’s role is to nurture his wife into being a Proverbs 31 woman.  Too many men put a lid – a gag order on their wives – stymieing their Godly development.

The Proverbs 31 woman is God’s ideal.

It takes a life-time to grow into this kind of Godly wisdom.  Studying the Proverbs gives a young lady a tremendous foundation and head start.

Proverbs 31 women are rare.  We will see a glowing tribute to Godly women.

Proverbs 31:

10  Who can find a virtuous woman?  For her price is far above rubies.

11  The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil.

Yes, she is faithful to her husband – but that is not the question here.

The husband trusts her judgment to make good and right decisions.

That frees the husband up to achieve even greater successes in his own endeavors.

There is a difference between our “needs” and our “wants” – we must know the difference.

Matthew 6:

33  But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things [clothes, food necessities], shall be added unto you. [Those are the “needs” – not the “wants.”]

34  Take therefore no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof.

The Proverbs 31 woman submits to her husband for the sake of their mutual success.

Proverbs 31:

12  She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life.

Proverbs 19:

14  House and riches are the inheritance of fathers: and a prudent wife is from the LORD.

Women have insight.

Proverbs 31:

13  She seeks wool, and flax, and works willingly with her hands.

14  She is like the merchants' ships; she brings her food from afar.

15  She rises also while it is yet night, and gives meat to her household, and a portion to her maidens.

16  She considers a field, and buys it: with the fruit of her hands she plants a vineyard.

17  She girds her loins with strength, and strengthens her arms.

18  She perceives that her merchandise is good: her candle goes not out by night.

19  She lays her hands to the spindle, and her hands hold the distaff.

20  She stretches out her hand to the poor; yea, she reaches forth her hands to the needy.

21  She is not afraid of the snow for her household: for all her household are clothed with scarlet.

22  She makes herself coverings of tapestry; her clothing is silk and purple.

23  Her husband is known in the gates, when he sits among the elders of the land.

24  She makes fine linen, and sells it; and delivers girdles unto the merchant.

25  Strength and honour are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come.

26  She opens her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness.

27  She looks well to the ways of her household, and eats not the bread of idleness.

28  Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her.

29  Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all.

30  Favor is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that fears the LORD, she shall be praised.

31  Give her of the fruit of her hands; and let her own works praise her in the gates.

What does God expect of holy women in today's world?  There are not many women today who have set their life's goal to be a trustworthy, virtuous woman. 

Is it possible for a woman in today's culture to live up to the Godly standards of the Proverb 31 woman?

What does it take for a young lady to grow into the mature mother described in these verses?

Proverbs 31 is not about romantic love like we saw in the song of Solomon – it is more about a mature woman with her life all together.

Mature in mind and spirit.

We are seeing a relationship between a Mother and her complete household – that is with her Husband and children – and others.

In today’s world way too many women – having gone off on wrong tangents – find their lives on the rocks.

Too many women have not been fully nurtured to become all that God intends them to be.

Physically, all young women grow up , but not all women mature in their minds, hearts and spirit – some remain little girls all their lives…

That is because their life’s choices and environment were not conducive to the maturation process that God intends.

Does the Proverbs 31 woman exist today – who is she? 

Young ladies should set a goal for themselves of becoming a modern Proverbs 31 woman?

It is a goal that is attainable.

A wife, in a Godly marriage, should be able to attain to her highest potential – both in this life – and in the Kingdom of God.

We will see that these Scriptures are relevant in modern society.

Yes, some young men and women live their lives as singles – but these Scriptures in Proverbs are meant to show the ideal system that God has ordained.

It is good for us to see and know it.

In God's sight and in ours – a Proverbs 31 woman is priceless.

Let’s go back through the verses: - and we will see a glowing tribute to the good wife.

First of all we see that the Proverbs 31 woman is rare indeed.

God speaks highly of her industriousness and qualities.

Proverbs 31:

10  Who can find a virtuous / excellent / valor / woman? for her price is far above rubies. / more precious than Jewels.

11  The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil. / no lack of gain. [gain = spoils of war]

“trust in her” = That is not talking about her faithfulness

– as much as it attests to her dependability.

Her husband safely relies on her – he trusts her judgment.

The sense of this verse is that because of his wife – he is much better off – she is not costing him.

Some husbands erroneously think that their wives are “Costing them” and holding them back – they are still foolish.

It is not that they have become filthy rich – having everything they want – but they have everything they need.

I hope we understand the difference between wants and needs.

Our needs being met is an eternal spiritual principle

The Proverbs 31 woman is committed to her husband's success.

Proverbs 31:

12  She will do him good and not evil / harm all the days of her life.

“Do him good” means that she fully justifies the confidence he places in her.

Some people are born into wealth – others work their way up by the sweat of their brow – but a Proverbs 31 wife is a gift of God.

Proverbs 19:

14  House and riches are the inheritance of fathers: and a prudent / intelligent / skillful wife is from the LORD.

The wife is the Godly helpmate of the husband – a divinely provided helpmate to him.

She is God’s gift to the husband – therefore to the family.

She is the perfect complement to him in terms of personality, managerial skills and talents, and spiritual gifts.

If the husband tries to rely upon his own abilities only, he is not taking advantage of all the resources that God has provided to him.  He misses out on a lot.

If the husband “shushes” his wife when she speaks, he is stymieing her growth.

The Proverbs 31 woman and her husband have a symbiotic working relationship whereby they achieve more together than the two of them working separately.  By themselves they can’t get much done.

Spiritually, the sum of their gifts are greater-> they achieve much greater growth.  1+1=3 principle.

Wives are given insight – which we men do not possess.

There is an interesting pattern in Scriptures that has God bringing the woman to the manand not the other way around.

Let’s look at that for a moment.

Eve was brought to Adam:

Genesis 2:

22  And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man.

Rebecca was brought to Isaac:

Genesis 24:

63  And Isaac went out to meditate in the field at the eventide: and he lifted up his eyes, and saw, and, behold, the camels were coming – all the way from Mesopotamia,

Rachel was brought to Jacob:

Genesis 29:

9  And while he yet spoke with them, Rachel came with her father's sheep: for she kept them.

Even the bride of Christ – the Church – is brought to the Bridegroom,

Jesus Christ, – one member at a time by the Father.

John 6:

65  And he said, Therefore said I unto you, that no man can come unto me, except it were given unto him of my Father.

The Proverbs 31 wife is cheerful in her work – enjoys what she is doing.

She knows quality when she sees it.

She sees to it that there is an ample supply of materials and clothing for her family.

Proverbs 31:

13  She seeks wool, and flax, and works willingly with her hands.

She considers her household's needs as her highest priority.

She develops her sources:

–      best bargains

–      knows where to shop

Proverbs 31:

14  She is like the merchants' ships; she brings her food from afar.

She is no sluggard – not lazy

Proverbs 20:

4  The sluggard will not plow by reason of the cold; therefore shall he beg in harvest, and have nothing.

“It is too cold to work today…”

She does not find excuses not to do her duties.

Proverbs 31:

15  She rises also while it is yet night, and gives meat to her household, and portions to her maidens.

“Portions to her maidens”  Yes she has maids – but it is not because she is waited on hand and foot – it is because she has so much going on – she has to have the extra help – she is a good employer and boss.

Maids increase the ability of the matrons of the home.  Some people think the purpose of maids is to do all the work while the wife sits around and eats bon bons.  Not so!

Having the extra household help frees up the wife to be of even greater service to others – visiting the needs of the elderly and the needs of sick brethren, the poor and the fatherless, and the community.  She is good to work for.

“Gives meat to her household” means that before daybreak she get the day’s meals going first thing – lunches for the kids – and so forth.

She is thoughtful in her planning and execution – shops and compares – watches trends – finds good bargains – not wasteful.

Women have a knack for real estate – they come by it naturally – they are good at it.  My wife Sharon found real good deals on most of the homes we have lived in – and we always made a handsome profit when it was time to move on.

Proverbs 31:

16  She considers a field, and buys it: with the fruit of her hands .  That means that she has made her profits, she plants a vineyard.

 “She plants a vineyard” – doesn’t mean so much with her own hands – as it means she directs her resources productively.  In other words – she invests for the future – wisely.

She takes care of herself physically.  She maintains her health with vigor and zeal.

Proverbs 31:

17  She girds her loins with strength, and strengthens her arms.

 “Girds her loins with strength,” means she develops her God given talents.  She keeps her mind straight.

Psalm 93:

1  The LORD reigns, he is clothed with majesty; the LORD is clothed with strength, wherewith He hath girded Himself: the world also is established, that it cannot be moved.

The Proverbs 31 wife develops her God given talents.  She has a good eye for opportunities – works long hours – plans for the future.

She keeps the home fires burning.  Folks are welcome anytime.

Proverbs 31:

18  She perceives that her merchandise is good: her candle   / lamp goes not out by night.

She “perceives”- Hebrew “ta am” means that she can taste it.

Someone pursuing a successful goal says, “I can almost taste it.”

Psalm 34:

8  O taste and see that the LORD is good: blessed is the man that trusts in Him.

She is a worker – she does not delegate every single duty to others – she is hands on.  People appreciate that.

Here is an example from my construction days: 

One morning it was below freezing and we had some muddy conditions in which to make some quality welds down in some below-grade foundations.

When the 7 am whistle blew, I cranked off the welding machine and jumped down in the hole and lined up the first joint to be welded and got my team moving.

If your construction team perceives that the work they are doing is beneath the boss’ dignity – it hurts morale.

After the workers got started, I was able to busy myself with the more comfortable duties of blueprints and work schedules – but I had the respect of my crew.

Proverbs 31:

19  She lays her hands to the spindle, and her hands hold the distaff.

Today, everybody wants to be a “supervisor” – some are really just trying to get out of work.  That is not a good trait to have.

She, however, sets an example with her work for others to measure up to.  She sets the standard for her household.

She is generous and helpful to her staff.

Notice – she is not self centered, like so many women today are.  They are a god unto themselves.

When women make it all about themselves – and their careers – they don’t realize it – but they are limiting their overall potential and development.

The Proverbs 31 woman was not born that way – she was developed – it took a lot of work – and her husband helped.

She has compassion for the poor.

She is generous.

Proverbs 31:

20  She stretches out her hand to the poor; yea, she reaches forth her hands to the needy.

Believe it or not – one of the reasons the Proverbs 31 woman is doing so well – is because of her generosity.

It is that spiritual principle 1+1=3 again!

Eternal principle is here…

Proverbs 11:

24  There is that scatters, [to the poor] and yet increases; and there is that withholds more [stingy] than is meet, but it tends to poverty.

That Spiritual principle seems backward – but it is not backward – because of Godly love.

The world says that is nonsense –“How can generosity lead to prosperity?”  But it does – try it – prove it for yourselves.  You will always have all you need.

Here it is again:

Proverbs 22:

9  He that hath a bountiful eye shall be blessed; for he gives of his bread to the poor.

The Proverbs 31 woman is not easily deterred from her duties.

Some people fall into the habit of almost looking for a reason or excuse to get out of work.

She is prepared for what ever obstacles comes her way.

Proverbs 31:

21  She is not afraid of the snow for her household: for all her household are clothed with scarlet. “shaniy” = red insect / double thickness.

Her family is well clothed.

Her family is well dressed for the cold – or any occasion.

Some people will say she is materialistic – but God shows that it is okay to have nice things also.

Look at how God adorns his bride in Ezekiel 16.

God does not want His people poor and barefooted.

Ezekiel 16:

10  I clothed thee also with broidered work, and shod thee with badgers' skin, [mink coat today] and I girded thee about with fine linen, and I covered thee with silk.

Silk is good, strong, smooth, beautiful material.

Ezekiel 16:

11  I decked thee also with ornaments, and I put bracelets upon thy hands, and a chain on thy neck.

God wants His wife to look healthy and beautiful – not unkempt hair.

Ezekiel 16:

12  And I put a jewel on thy forehead, and earrings in thine ears, and a beautiful crown upon thine head.

13  Thus were thou decked with gold and silver; and thy raiment was of fine linen, and silk, and broidered work; thou didst eat fine flour, and honey, and oil: and thou were exceeding beautiful, and thou didst prosper into a kingdom.

God made women to be beautiful.

Ezekiel 16:

14  And thy renown went forth among the heathen for thy beauty: for it was perfect through my comeliness, which I had put upon thee, saith the Lord GOD.

Proverbs 31:

22  She makes herself coverings of tapestry / bed coverings; her clothing is silk and purple.

The Proverbs 31 wife is a loving and giving wife.

She is committed to her husband's success.

She wants him to be a success.

They are a team – serving and helping one another.

Submitting to each other in the fear of God – for the benefit of all.

Ephesians 5:

21  Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God.

Yes!  The husband submits to the wife also – to provide what she needs – he even lays his life down for her salvation.

Ephesians 5:

25  Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;

She is stability to his life – she is not dragging him down or nagging.

She respects that her husband is the head of the family – making every sacrifice for his family – as Christ has done for us – the Church brethren.

Therefore, she, too, the wife, submits herself unto her own husband, as unto the Lord.   [in a Godly way]

Ephesians 5:

22  Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.

Husband – you put a roof over her head and provide te needs of the children – and see if she can submit to that.

She does not erroneously reason (as some wives do) that his gain is her loss. 

No – his gain is her gain – because they are one – one flesh.

Proverbs 31:

23  Her husband is known in the gates, when he sits among the elders of the land. = The old sages.

“The gates,” means family court – city hall – courthouse – Judges of the city.

He is able to devote himself to public affairs – as a respected member of the community.

He doesn’t have to worry about things falling apart when he is gone to work – because of his wife’s dependability.

* “Husband is known” – that means he has a good reputation for having a good wife and an orderly household.

Because of his wife’s sterling example – his reputation is bolstered.

He has a good household.

Paul said:

1 Corinthians 11:

15  But if a woman have long hair, it is a glory to her:

Let me ask you a question – What is a man’s glory?

1 Corinthians 11:

7  The woman is the glory of the man?

She has a mind for business – production and distribution.

Proverbs 31:

24  She makes fine linen [garments - Somewhat like a shawl, cloak, or poncho – (even pajamas some experts say sleep wear.], and sells it; and delivers [trade barter, sell] girdles /sashes, belts unto the merchant.

“And sells it;” means single, bulk, maybe even quantity discounts.

She carries herself with dignity and respect she is secure and optimistic – with a proper pride in her work.

Proverbs 31:

25  Strength and honour [dignity] are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come.   [She does not have to worry about the future.]

“Strength and honour” [dignity] also have the connotation of being financially secure and protected, and the esteem which comes with it.

It is possible to destroy your life’s potential.  Ladies, please do not make that mistake.

She is wise and kind.  She exhibits good sense and discretion.

Proverbs 31:

26  She opens her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness.   [teaching of kindness]

She is not “commurne.”  French for "common, cheap or low-down."

There is an old saying that some people may want to consider you to be a fool – why then open your mouth and remove all the doubt.

Do not say things that are ugly, mean spirited or berating.

“Law of kindness” / “teaching of kindness” – what a beautiful trait in a Godly woman.

She considers her family's needs first.  She is hard-working and well-organized.

Like Abigail:

Proverbs 31:

27  She looks well to the ways of her household, and eats not the bread of idleness.

Abigail certainly did – or her entire household would have been wiped out.

She does stay busy!  She uses her feminine modesty, compassion, love and gentleness to create a happy home.

Proverbs 31:

28  Her children arise up [rise and stand up with respect], and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her.

Good job honey…that was great…You are so special…

Everybody needs encouragement.

“arise up,” means respect.  Who sands out of respect any more – or removes their hat?

Lots of people think they have it all together – when in fact their lives are only a charade.

They put up a good front – but it is a façade.

The Proverbs 31 woman has put all Godly principles to work in her life – achieving what God considers success.

Proverbs 31:

29  Many daughters have done virtuously / excellently, but thou excel them all.  [You surpass them all].

When a husband desires to have an excellent wife – the first thing he should do is:  Start treating her like one.

Say something nice …note 

She doesn’t just excel in one facet of her life – her career (for example:)

She has found the right balance

in working,

In being a  wife,

In being a mother.

And working with others.  [It is a juggling act]

* The main way she has achieved this success is by absolutely putting God first in her life!

She has her priorities in order.

She has honest ethics.  She keeps the 10 Commandments in all she does – at home, in business, with all people.

Psalm 111:

10  The fear  / reverence for God’s way/  of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom: a good understanding have all they that do his commandments: his praise endures forever.

Proverbs 31:

30  Favor / Grace / Charm is deceitful, and beauty / good looks is passing/ is vain: but a woman that fears the LORD, she shall be praised. / is to be praised. [continuously.]

A young lady naturally blossoms at 17 or 18 years old – it is to be replaced with a lasting Godly beauty. 

Proverbs 3:

1  My son, forget not my law; but let thine heart keep my commandments:

2  For length of days, and long life, and peace, shall they add to thee.

3  Let not mercy and truth forsake thee: bind them about thy neck; write them upon the table of thine heart:

Always have mercy and truth in everything you do.

Proverbs 3:

4  So shalt thou find favor and good understanding in the sight of God and man.

Don’t treat your wife nice at church services – and then bite her head off at home.  That is not a good thing in God’s sight.

Proverbs 3:

5  Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.

6  In all thy ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct thy paths.

The Bible shows us how to live.

God says, “My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge.

Proverbs 3:

7  Be not wise in thine own eyes: fear the LORD, and depart from evil.

Proverbs 31:

31  Give her [your wife] of the fruit of her hands / let her have her profits; and let her own works praise her in the gates. / Her works speak for themselves.  Give her credit where credit is due. 

Wives are entitled to buy nice things for themselves.

Some people will never give Credit where it is due – for fear it will go to the person’s head – God says give credit when due.

“Let her own works praise her in the gates” she has earned her own reputation in the community.

This section of scripture – Proverbs 31:10 – 31, is a self contained whole – it is meant to be taken all together.

We can tell that because it is an acrostic poem - like A,B,C,D,E..

Do – re –  me – faw – so – la – tee – do  (octave)

In the movie, “The Sound of Music” there was a song like this…

It makes it easy to memorize and remember.

Doe,   a deer, a female deer
Ray,     a drop of golden sun
Me,      a name I call myself
Far,      a long, long way to run
Sew,    a needle pulling thread
La,       a note to follow Sew
Tea,     a drink with jam and bread
That will bring us back to Do (oh-oh-oh)

Like a mnemonic device helps us to remember things, aiding the memory.

An acrostic poem is easy to memorize and remember.

In the Old Testament times children learned Proverbs 31 in this way.

Proverbs 31 is set to the Hebrew alphabet the same way.

Most Israelitish girls knew the story because this poem was traditionally recited or sung in the home every week as the Sabbath drew on.

It was often on their minds.

Young women of the Old Testament looked to the virtuous woman of Proverbs 31 as their ideal.

That is what they wanted to be when they grew up.  That is a good thing.

I do not know who a proper role model is today – except for Godly mothers in the congregation.  Not the movie stars… or the women we see on TV.

Even Mary, the mother of Jesus, had this role model of the Virtuous Woman in the forefront of her mind from earliest childhood.

The Father and The Word had to pick a woman to carry the seed of God… Pure, Virgin… right kind of family, etc…

Many men will search for a beautiful wife, but far fewer men seek a wife of excellence.

Today, there are not many Proverbs 31 Women to be found anywhere.

Young Ladies – Please seek to be a Proverbs 31 woman.


Sermon:  "Proverbs 31 woman"